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9:06am November 28, 2014
My Family in One Photo, It’s a Miracle! The only picture I have of my whole family together, because normally my mom takes all the pictures, so I have very few shots of her (she needs to learn to take selfies, I’m dead serious about that, I want more photos of her). And it’s a crappy Polaroid shot, of the sort that are trendy to simulate these days, oh well. My brother Shane’s graduation from either high school or community college. My dad looks horrible in suits, I’m glad they just buried him in a shroud basically. I’m in front, with Shane holding on to my hand. From left to right in back: Anna (mom), Shane (eldest brother), Ron (dad), Jeremy (middle brother). You can visibly see the huge age difference between me and my brothers, accentuated by the fact that my entire family is tall (or was before age shrank them) and I was short enough that for awhile doctors worried I wasn’t following the growth curve. Yes, we called our parents Anna and Ron. Calling them mom or dad used to mean we either were in trouble and trying to get on their good side, or else trying to wheedle money or car keys or something out of them. Actual conversation overheard in my house: Jeremy: Hey dad… Ron: (sigh) How much money do you want? People thought we were disrespectful because we used our parents’ first names. Our parents didn’t think so though. They thought being forced to refer to your parents by a title was weird and confusing. Shane had started it by calling them their first names but they didn’t mind so the rest of us did it too. Jeremy is 9 years older than me, Shane is 14 years older than me, and I’m what happened when my parents went to Henry Coe State Park hiking and camping, and forgot their protection. The date on the fishing license was November 15, I was born August 15. Do the math. That’s how my dad described it anyway. But I was wanted, just unplanned. My dad’s favorite thing to say about the matter: “You’re the best mistake I ever made!” Anyway, sometimes my brothers seemed like brothers, other times they seemed like having four parents would seem, especially after my brothers grew up and I was still a kid.

My Family in One Photo, It’s a Miracle!

The only picture I have of my whole family together, because normally my mom takes all the pictures, so I have very few shots of her (she needs to learn to take selfies, I’m dead serious about that, I want more photos of her). And it’s a crappy Polaroid shot, of the sort that are trendy to simulate these days, oh well. My brother Shane’s graduation from either high school or community college. My dad looks horrible in suits, I’m glad they just buried him in a shroud basically.

I’m in front, with Shane holding on to my hand. From left to right in back: Anna (mom), Shane (eldest brother), Ron (dad), Jeremy (middle brother). You can visibly see the huge age difference between me and my brothers, accentuated by the fact that my entire family is tall (or was before age shrank them) and I was short enough that for awhile doctors worried I wasn’t following the growth curve.

Yes, we called our parents Anna and Ron. Calling them mom or dad used to mean we either were in trouble and trying to get on their good side, or else trying to wheedle money or car keys or something out of them. Actual conversation overheard in my house:

Jeremy: Hey dad…

Ron: (sigh) How much money do you want?

People thought we were disrespectful because we used our parents’ first names. Our parents didn’t think so though. They thought being forced to refer to your parents by a title was weird and confusing. Shane had started it by calling them their first names but they didn’t mind so the rest of us did it too.

Jeremy is 9 years older than me, Shane is 14 years older than me, and I’m what happened when my parents went to Henry Coe State Park hiking and camping, and forgot their protection. The date on the fishing license was November 15, I was born August 15. Do the math. That’s how my dad described it anyway. But I was wanted, just unplanned. My dad’s favorite thing to say about the matter: “You’re the best mistake I ever made!”

Anyway, sometimes my brothers seemed like brothers, other times they seemed like having four parents would seem, especially after my brothers grew up and I was still a kid.

Notes:
  1. natalunasans said: i always called mine by their first names after i found out that’s what other people called them… and they didn’t mind.
  2. withasmoothroundstone posted this