4:46am November 30, 2014

Etymology of friend

I love etymology sometimes!

Old English frēond, of Germanic origin; related to Dutch vriend and German Freund, from an Indo-European root meaning ‘to love’, shared by FREE

So friend comes from a root word meaning to love, and is related to free in that they come from the same ancient root word – they’re cousins! I was surprised about the connection to free. Not surprised about love, but about sharing that root of love with free.

This by the way is the same linguistic “splinter skill” I have (I hate that term but it’ll have to do because it doesn’t rise to the level of savant but is definitely autism-related). I pick up patterns between words and their roots very easily,often without needing a dictionary to show me the words that have a common origin.

This has made it possible for me to read passably in foreign (mostly Indo-European in origin because that’s what I’ve been exposed to, but sometimes others) languages without knowing what language I’m reading! If only it gave me typed or aural fluency… but sadly I am not talented at language in general, only at certain small aspects like this one, and like never having experienced the neurotypical language regression that renders NTs unable to differentiate between sounds in foreign languages.

Combined with good echolalia skills I had my first French teacher (a native Parisian) demanding to know when I’d been exposed to French as a little kid and not taking “never” for an answer. Little did she know I was using the same skills that allowed me to fake more fluency and communication skills in English than I actually had: Listen to conversations, notice patterns between question and response, use echolalia to repeat those patterns without necessarily understanding a single word of what I was saying. I even picked up the natural cadence of the language to pronounce my (very un-French) name like a French speaker would pronounce it.

Unfortunately these skills are good party tricks but they don’t have to lead to either fluency or comprehension. Also I got a lot of my word roots originally by reading long dictionaries of baby name meanings, cover to cover.

Anyway, I do have language skills, they’re just scattered tiny islands with steep cliffs, to paraphrase Alex Anderson. Not enough to give me the reputation as “good with languages” that some of my family have believed of me. A person good with languages speaks at least two. I speak only one (plus basic basic French, which doesn’t count as speaking a language for real) and with big gaps in comprehension and expression even in my “first"and only fluent language. Even in English, I have both great talents and great flaws, often side by side. I struggle with it every day yet I also manage poetry and eloquence quite often. It is hard to explain to outsiders, and insiders need little explanation as they live it themselves.

But friend and free share a common root in love and that’s beautiful.