as small as a world and as large as alone

12:49am July 17, 2015

thatautismfeel:

that autism feel when gender is really confusing concept and you struggle to identify with your assigned gender because of it, and you can’t help but wonder if you’d still be confused about it if you weren’t autistic.

(while at the same time you’re relatively calm with the agender label which probably means you’re not making it all up?)

I know I’m not making it all up, because I sort of came up with the concept of genderlessness on my own, independently of other people coming up with the concept.  (At the time I called it being nongendered, but I meant the same thing as most people who call themselves agender and some people who call themselves neutrois, and I  now prefer genderless because the word flows better in my head than any of the alternatives.)  But I have wondered how much being autistic has to do with it.

What I hate is being told that my experience of gender doesn’t matter and that I just shouldn’t think about it, ever.  Total strangers have said this to me many times.  That if I don’t experience gender then I shouldn’t think about gender and genderlessness and that gender shouldn’t matter anyway therefore (long series of complicated ideas that I can’t wrap my head around).

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