6:24pm June 27, 2012

OMG I want to curl up in a ball under my bed.

I updated my communication software. There was a way to make it keep my old vocabulary but that destroyed it and for many reasons had to reinstall. So now it’s only the new vocabulary. And the new vocabulary is totally different. They had a choice between vocabularies do why wasn’t their old one one of the choices?!?!

And now… I can’t find anything. What I could find looked like yes maybe it will work better in the long run. But until then. OMFG. I can’t find a damn thing. My head is spinning. I’m nauseated. I’m probably getting a migraine.

And it doesn’t make sense. I can’t even read the words on the screen. It’s just a bunch of meaningless lines. I want to hide from my iPad but I can’t because it’s how I talk and use the net and stuff. But I feel like someone has gone into my head and rearranged my brain and…

I seriously wonder if I’d do better writing an entirely new vocabulary from scratch, basing it off my old customizations and the stuff that’s still on my iTouch. But I probably would never be able to focus long enough. That kind of thing makes my brain turn into words and blocks and crap.

Every time I try to look at the new vocabulary it feels like it’s assaulting me.

I wish it was an actual object. Then I could leave it in the corner and approach it slowly over time. And run off if it freaked me out. But it’s not. It’s right in my face and every time I look it blasts me with I don’t even know what.

Actually I think I may know a way to restore it. Wow. Good. Hopefully this will work. Then I really could get used to the new vocabulary without feeling like I’m trapped into it.

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