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8:56am July 31, 2012

khatdog:

cosmopolitan-fascist:

proto-flake:

cosmopolitan-fascist:

proto-flake said: They literally cannot comprehend it. None of it is their experience. I know with my white bf any kind of exuberant emotion makes him intensely uncomfortable and he would just as soon not be exposed to it…


After explaining things to him patiently for like 30 minutes I got kinda emotional and hyperbolic and sarcastic. He IMMEDIATELY told me that my argument is based on ‘overly emotional and dramatic appeals’. I mean why cant I stay as stoic as him the 100th time I’ve explained something that intimately affects my life.

Ack! Don’t get me started on this!!! LOL

Mike loves, LOVES people who can calmly sit and speak their minds and “not raise their voice or get excited” at any point. He comments on this shit constantly when we watch anything where someone is discussing something that could be considered heated. He thinks this is one of the top ways to behave.

This drives me nuts for two reasons:

1. I really wish, and have struggled for YEARS, to conduct myself in this way and I fail fail FAIL.

2. I cannot help but speak passionately about what I am passionate about and when my bf constantly sings the praises of those who behave in a way I feel incapable of it makes me feel intensely inadequate.

*sigh*



UGHHH i HAAAAAATE the gendered nature of this argument!

i am such a stoic person that most of my friends are baffled at what i am saying or thinking and pass me off as an ice queen bitch. there are *FEW* things that get me riled up and often uncontrollably i will get so fucking upset when having these calm and composed conversations.

and then he says ‘well you get emotional’ as proof that he is more impartial—- so the white man’s perspective is always the ‘impartial’ or default. maybe you actually should be partial because that might being connected with these systems of power on the losing end ughghg

blech this sounds like an exact replica of an ex of mine. he would interrogate every goddamn “politically charged” thing i got emotional about in this obnoxious socratic method kind of way until he got an explanation out of me in mostly his words that he was satisfied with. and i never said this, but i couldn’t stop thinking, “aren’t my tears a TESTAMENT to how fucked up this is, as opposed to just simple proof how hysterical and emotional i am?! do you really think i’m using my emotions purposefully as my weapon of choice for some cold, ‘objective’ debate?”

Notes:
  1. withasmoothroundstone reblogged this from khatdog