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1:04pm September 13, 2012
[Me in the hospital with a box feliscorvus made me.] They cured the pneumonia. In excruciating ways. Now I’m just trying to get over the aftermath. I’m really weak, I’m having to take heavy duty nausea meds (with Benadryl because they are a neuroleptic I’ve reacted to in the past) and barely avoiding constant puking. My first day or two was not spent resting and being taken care of properly. It was spent dipping into my last energy reserves to keep out of deadly situations the staff didn’t even know about, and trying desperately to get proper care while delirious and barely able to type. Fortunately I had help because that alone wasn’t enough. I was moved to a better ward and got better care but still had to fight. And now I’m white knuckling a whole lot of nausea because once I start it’s really hard to get it to stop And this is even with lots of meds. I am having trouble eating jello. Pain level is off the charts and I’m mostly refusing narcotics because of nausea so it’s hell. It’s more important for my stomach to heal than to feel good. Hate having to choose. I can’t usually concentrate. I spend hours starting at my I’VE drip or beads or the box. I can’t read or watch TV and the net is hard to use. This is my first day without hallucinating. To my knowledge. I was brought up to this ward really out of it and it only looks like a real room today. I feel like every kind of hell. And I’m not coming home until I’m fully functional for me. So it may still be awhile. It amazes me sometimes the way I can handle extended periods of doing absolutely nothing while in excruciating pain and completely disoriented. I think the pain is going to go on a while too.

[Me in the hospital with a box feliscorvus made me.]

They cured the pneumonia. In excruciating ways.

Now I’m just trying to get over the aftermath. I’m really weak, I’m having to take heavy duty nausea meds (with Benadryl because they are a neuroleptic I’ve reacted to in the past) and barely avoiding constant puking.

My first day or two was not spent resting and being taken care of properly. It was spent dipping into my last energy reserves to keep out of deadly situations the staff didn’t even know about, and trying desperately to get proper care while delirious and barely able to type. Fortunately I had help because that alone wasn’t enough. I was moved to a better ward and got better care but still had to fight.

And now I’m white knuckling a whole lot of nausea because once I start it’s really hard to get it to stop And this is even with lots of meds. I am having trouble eating jello.

Pain level is off the charts and I’m mostly refusing narcotics because of nausea so it’s hell. It’s more important for my stomach to heal than to feel good. Hate having to choose.

I can’t usually concentrate. I spend hours starting at my I’VE drip or beads or the box. I can’t read or watch TV and the net is hard to use.

This is my first day without hallucinating. To my knowledge. I was brought up to this ward really out of it and it only looks like a real room today.

I feel like every kind of hell. And I’m not coming home until I’m fully functional for me. So it may still be awhile.

It amazes me sometimes the way I can handle extended periods of doing absolutely nothing while in excruciating pain and completely disoriented. I think the pain is going to go on a while too.