9:45am May 22, 2013

➸ Janna's weird crap: josiahd: leapingrabbit: mousesinger: frauluther: Last night on the way...

josiahd:

leapingrabbit:

mousesinger:

frauluther:

Last night on the way to the store I walked by the sidewalk cafe and a guy was condescendingly explaining schrodinger to his slightly annoyed date.

…maybe that was my ex husband?? Lol. Funny thing is, I used to think that…

I used to think that making me feel stupid during conversations was just something your friends did. It took me a long time to realize those weren’t friends, or at least not good ones. Most not friends at all. I don’t mean making me feel stupid through my own insecurity, either. I mean treating casual conversations as if they were formal arguments and running over me and being condescending as hell if I couldn’t or wouldn’t keep up. I tried to learn to respond in kind and I just couldn’t, or not very well. I would end up feeling like I was dangling in midair because I’d long ran past my intellectual limits. And it just wasn’t good, or right, or fair, but nobody told me friends weren’t supposed to treat me like that, so I never noticed for a really long time. I’d go into conversations expecting to be trampled and treated like I just didn’t understand things well. Even though often I understood them better than the other person, I just couldn’t cite studies so my point of view was considered worthless. I tried to act like that because I thought you were supposed to, but it never felt right and I soon became unable to do it at all. I’ve since developed a firm loathing for the entire “you must cite studies and avoid so called fallacies if you want your opinion to be considered valid” line of thought. Conversations are not debate club.

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