as small as a world and as large as alone

4:36am December 22, 2013

madeofpatterns:

youneedacat:

madeofpatterns:

It’s different when you have these inner concepts, this inner form of cognition and you have *no way of connecting that to words*. (Or anything else other people can understand.)

I had that. And sometimes I felt like my soul was trapped in the middle of all these distorting mirrors and stuff.

It’s still hard for me to believe some of my communication problems are real.

Because I can talk. And I can have really good conversations, even verbally. Get me in the right context, in the right time, and I can do all these things.

And I write a blog. And I have a lot of good words. I am good at words.

But then there’s all the things I can’t say. And all the contexts in which I can’t communicate well. And the ones I avoid because I know I won’t be able to, to the point where I don’t even notice anymore.

But even writing this, I think I’m faking it for attention.

This makes me so angry at the sort of people who start rumors that disabled people are faking things for attention.

56 notes