as small as a world and as large as alone

10:43pm May 21, 2014

twiceunexceptional:

It seems like most neurotypical people don’t understand what happens when I shutdown.  Reactions of an autistic mind are an enigma that could be easily solved if they took time to learn and understand.

When I shutdown, I’m drowning.  I can’t see, I can’t hear, and I can’t think of anything other than escape.  I’m trapped within myself and smothered out by noises and aromas and sensations provided by others.  It leaves me feeling claustrophobic and panicked.  Shutting down isn’t just an undisciplined reaction to something displeasing; it’s a defensive technique I instinctively go to.

If only NT people would understand.

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