9:22am May 29, 2014

➸ Okay seriously? Call me old-fashioned but...

youneedacat:

…I’m not going to get into a public discussion of my feelings about my most intimate genitalia, just to satisfy someone’s curiosity that my genderlessness is ~real enough~. Suffice to say, there’s plenty of room there for discussion. But some of us don’t enjoy discussing our genitalia, let alone…

Exactly. This is a big reason why I am actually not incredibly keen on discussing my gender identity or lack thereof very often. I mean I will write about it sometimes simply for the sake of hoping maybe someone in a similar situation might come across it and feel less alone? But to be honest, there are many aspects of life I find way more interesting. And any time the subject comes up among people who don’t already “get it”…it has a tendency to turn into a big judgy authenticity-policing mess.

And that gets incredibly annoying for me as a person who *doesn’t even have an intrinsic gender to begin with*, because it almost feels like I start having to impose this weird “anti-gender” on myself just for the sake of discussing not having one. And that doesn’t feel any more authentically ME than asserting an intrinsic gender identification does.

I know exactly what you mean there.

Also, a lot of people on the genderlessness tags seem to be about taking pictures of themselves looking “gender-neutral”. And I see a lot of judgement towards anyone who “looks male” or “looks female” when the thing about not having a gender is that it means you can look however you want, whether it seems gendered or not to other people. Which, if you like looking “gender neutral” (which generally means fairly masculine with some elements of femininity) that’s fine, but it’s not what defines genderlessness at all for all people.

Notes: