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10:12am June 2, 2014
rumpelstiltskinix asked: Just another supporter here. I could go on a long rant about people who appropriate social justice causes for their own sick methods, but I won't. Sorry you're being put through this yet again. Both my partner and I wish you the best.

It’s okay.  And honestly I think it’s just a horrible misunderstanding, compounded by various other factors (like a culture on parts of tumblr that make it very hard to move past these situations, ever, no matter what actually happened).  I don’t want to believe actual malice until I see it.  And so far I see pain, and a probably sincere belief in a lot of things, and lashing out, but that’s not the same as malice.  For all I know there is malice, but I try not to assume it where it could be a lot of other things.  And it’s just as probable that someone sincerely believes that I did all those things and believe all those things and stand for all those things.  And in the face of that, people can feel justified in doing and saying quite a lot.  It’s not fair, but it is what it is.  I’ve been through worse.

ETA: Someone I trust emailed me to say they see glaring patterns of malice in what happened, so I guess I change my mind on this.  I have a hard time sometimes telling the difference between malice, and lashing out in a nasty way from feeling hurt.  They’re both nasty, but they stem from different places.  But if she says she sees malice, I trust that she’s probably right.  Which is unfortunately.

Notes:
  1. clatterbane said: I had to interpret it as malice, too, FWIW. Benefit of the doubt only goes so far sometimes. :(
  2. withasmoothroundstone posted this