3:51am June 3, 2014

The thing that disturbs me about both FC and RPM.

And I want to start out saying that I support the use of both FC and RPM and related methods, when done right, because when done right, they can help people communicate who would not have learned to type, or handwrite, in any other way.

But.

The thing that disturbs me about both is that the communicator feels the need to lavish praise on their facilitators and trainers. Like over-the-top praise. Of the kind that strikes me more as fear. "Please don’t go away, please don’t make me go back to not being able to communicate, please don’t make me go back to that life.“

And with that fear comes the fact that their lives are not in their control. People whose lives are in their control are not in that kind of fear.

And the praise doesn’t look like fear to most people. But as someone who’s experienced that kind of fear, it looks horrifying.

To most people, it looks like "It’s amazing how gracious they are with their gratitude, it must really be that they have a higher spiritual awareness than normal people, or even than autistic people who can speak.”

It makes me want to scream.

Because that’s not what it is.

It’s not spiritual.

It’s terror.

It’s unreasoning terror.

And it has no place in a healthy relationship.

But they’re encouraged to pin their entire survival on the people who helped them communicate. They’re encouraged to see it that way. And nobody seems to see through all this.

(Full disclosure: Sometimes I need kinds of support that have been described by some as similar to FC. Not usually, not all the time. But when I need it, I need it. That’s why I know it isn’t just horseshit. But it’s also why I know a lot of the pitfalls up close and personal.)

Notes: