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1:38am June 7, 2014

lichgem:

lisaquestions:

lichgem:

Something I think about a lot is whether or not I could see meeting a person in real life and having them treat me with respect

And a lot of the times the answer is ‘no’

People have almost always been really shitty to me about my cognitive issues, even people I trusted to know better

Most people outside of my friend group would treat me like an idiot

I relate entirely too much to this. Like before I knew there was anything cognitive going on, I’d get this treatment. I never really understood way but it was so frustrating. I often felt like no one was seeing me as me, but were just interacting with stereotypes they had about someone like me.

Yeah. Like, people will treat me as babyish in this kind of affectionate way, and to some extent that’s because of how I act, but I’m not always consciously aware of how I act and that’s conditioning that I’d like people to not actually react to as though it’s a positive thing. :/

And other times it will be, people are annoyed with me, and mock me for not immediately understanding things that are obvious to them.

Or they’re controlling and think they need to tell me what to believe and what to say and get mad any time I have an opinion without letting them screen it for acceptability first.

I think I have a similar problem conditioning-wise.  I call it Cute Client Mode because in my case it’s been driven by the psych and DD systems and people wanting me to behave in a cute and childlike manner.