4:13pm July 13, 2014

How to reach out to people and places you love.

I don’t know how well any of this is going to translate to anyone’s experiences.  But I realized today how important it is.  Because I’ve been reaching out to my father, all day long, and he felt it.  And whether you believe that’s possible or not, I don’t care.  I just don’t.  In my life, these things happen, and they’re part of the world, and I can’t pretend they don’t.

So anyway… I’ve long had a way of reaching out to Anne when I’m in trouble.  For some reason I usually do it for comfort, when I’m in an absolutely horrible or painful situation and I just can’t stand it.  And reaching out to her like that, it’s like she can hold my hand from a distance and it makes everything much more bearable.

Other times I reach out to places.  The two most common are the redwoods (usually San Mateo or Santa Cruz counties) and parts of the Sierras.

And today I was reaching out to my father, I was even going to call him if he didn’t call me.  And I continued reaching out to him throughout our video Skype chat.  And he told me he could feel it, and that it was making a huge difference for him.  And that’s why I’ve decided to try to explain how I do this, even if I’m not successful in conveying it.  Because… in a situation where you’re separated from a loved one, and the loved one is dying, and you know you might never see them again… any connection you can form is vital.  And I’m realizing that more and more.  I’ve been trying to stay connected to him on some level all the time, so that if anything happens unexpectedly, I’ll be there.

So anyway… it basically goes like this.

I try to get really connected to what’s around me.  Really connected to my body.  Really connected to love.  And with my mind as clear as possible.

Obviously it’s not always possible to do all of those things at once, or to do any of them at once.  I just do the best I can.

Then I reach into love, and I find the thread that connects me with the person or place.

This is a deep thread.  It’s not like a tie on the surface.  It’s not a messy emotional tie, it’s not like… energy entanglement, for lack of a better word.  This is deeper than that.  It’s where everything is connected, all patterns connect.  And it’s important that you don’t get the two levels confused, because energy-entanglement crap (wow I hope I don’t sound as new age as that sounds to me, I just don’t have better words) will just cause problems for both of you.  What you’re aiming for is love, deep love, ultimate love.

And there are these thin filaments that seem to connect people and places and everything else, on that level of deep love.

And what I do is the mental equivalent of this:

I put my fingers very lightly on the thread that connects me to the person or place.  Like pinching the thread just enough to form a connection to it.

Then I pull back on the thread, very lightly, while focusing my love towards the person.  So I’m pulling with my fingers towards myself, but my mind and heart are aimed in the opposite direction, towards the person or place.

And then, if everything goes well, as I’m pulling back, the thread starts pulling me towards that place or person.  And then I can sense things about them, they can sense things about me, you can’t really predict or control what happens at that point.  All you have done is opened up a connection.  And if you’ve done it right, you’ve opened up a connection on a deep enough level that it’s not invasive or intrusive, it’s not entanglement, it’s love.  You’re still exactly where you are – you’re not actually going anywhere – but your mind and heart are deeply focused on another place, even as you’re not actually in that place.

So what you’re basically doing is using connections that already exist, and focusing on them in a way that involves love at the deepest possible level, and if you do it right, you become more aware of that person, and they may become more aware of you.  What they become aware of is anyone’s guess – my father said this morning he heard me yelping because my cat was attacking my feet.  But you do become aware of things, if you do it right.  And if both of you are doing this at the same time, it amplifies the effect.  

If you experience something really bad while trying to do this, then just remember that whatever the bad thing is, it is not love, and it has no reality compared to love.  Often the bad things will happen because of entanglements on much shallower levels than love exists on, which is why love is vital to this working right.

Understand… I’m not claiming to be special, I’m not claiming to have ‘powers’, this isn’t any different from what lots of people do all the time without even realizing it.  It’s just that for whatever reason I’ve become very aware of how to do it on purpose, especially after getting to know Anne.

I don’t actually like talking about things like this.  At least, I’d like to be able to talk about them, but normally I’m too wary to talk about them.  Because some people will think I’m trying to be special, some people will think I am special, some people will think I’m psychotic, some people will think I’m ridiculous, and… there’s all kinds of reactions I find equally as unpleasant as each other.  

But the reason I’m talking about this now?

Is because… if your family member is dying?  And you might not be able to see them before they die?  Connecting through this kind and level of love may be the closest connection you can have with them.  And that’s really important.  It may be the only way you can be with them when they die.  It may be a way you can connect with them more deeply even as you’re on the phone or Skype or IRC with them.  But if done right, it will bring you closer, and that is everything.  Love is everything, in these situations.  

And if this can help anyone connect more closely with a loved one, then it’s worth people laughing at me or thinking I’m stupid for believing this is real.  Honestly, I just see this as part of being able to sense how patterns fit together in the world, and a part of how love connects people, it’s a very normal and natural part of the world to me.  And I think more people have experiences like this both accidentally and on purpose, than will actually admit it in public.

And I feel so much better for having done this with my father today, and so does he.  He said that this time it really felt like I was in the room with him.  Instead of having to find things to say to him, I could sit there and crochet the edge on the afghan I’m working on, and just sit there and love him, and he could feel my love, and he could love me, and I could feel his love, and we didn’t have to talk unless we wanted to.  Which is exactly what I would be doing if I could be in the room with him for real.

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