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1:38pm July 21, 2014

madeofpatterns:

youneedacat:

madeofpatterns:

If I meet a woman who has a strong preference for female doctors, I assume that her life has been very different from mine.

I’m not exactly a woman, not exactly not.  (Sociologically in many ways I’m a woman, gender-identity-wise I’m genderless.  Both are important parts of my life and identity, regardless of what the trans community thinks of that.)

But I agree with you.

I’ve had a small number of very good doctors.  Their gender was completely irrelevant to my care.  My four best doctors are literally evenly split between male and female — male general practitioner, female pulmonologist, female general practitioner (back in California, the one who gradually made me not think of suicide every time I had a doctor’s appointment the next day), male neurologist.  So are my worst doctors, for that matter.

If I gave up my best male doctors because they were male, I would probably literally not be alive right now.  I would be dying of undiagnosed adrenal insufficiency that was caught by a male doctor.  And I might be in danger from a neural junction disorder that was caught this week by a male neurologist.  And caught right before we were wondering “Do I really need to be taking that Mestinon dose anyway, if the problem was entirely the adrenal stuff?”  Yes, yes I do need to be taking it, yes, yes, yes, definitely, holy CRAP I wasn’t expecting that EMG to turn an abnormal result.

that too.

but also…

I’m afraid of women in situatutions where I’m supposed to think women are safer.

Yes that too.  That’s completely a situation I find myself in, not so much with doctors but with care providers.  They always ask me if I feel safer with women, and the answer is always no, why would I?  The only care providers who ever sexually abused me were women, and most of the care providers who abused me in any way were women, I don’t understand why women are supposedly safer.

(And no, I made a decision not to report the sexual abuse because it was my word against hers and it was so subtle she made sure of that.)

Notes:
  1. slashmarks reblogged this from madeofpatterns and added:
    I agree that female doctors can be as/more dangerous as/than male doctors, but I have a very strong startle response to...
  2. madeofpatterns reblogged this from withasmoothroundstone and added:
    I thought I was supposed to feel safer with women as a teenager. It ended poorly.
  3. ischemgeek reblogged this from withasmoothroundstone and added:
    I was more confirming your impression, OP. And also ranting about some of the shitty docs I’ve had. Anger directed at...
  4. withasmoothroundstone reblogged this from madeofpatterns and added:
    I didn’t take it as an attack.
  5. r-dash2013 reblogged this from madeofpatterns and added:
    I didn’t comment to attack. Looks like it turned into more of a discussion than anything
  6. bukwrm reblogged this from withasmoothroundstone and added:
    I’ve only ever had one male doctor who was good for me, so I prefer women doctors just because they seem to listen and...
  7. callmemonstrous reblogged this from autistic-mom and added:
    also male doctors tend to stare at my breasts and that……….like. yeah.
  8. autistic-mom reblogged this from madeofpatterns and added:
    I’ve been hurt by both. By more male psychiatrists than female psychiatrists. But… I do prefer female doctors. Because,...
  9. chavisory said: Prefer a female OB/GYN…for all other purposes, I’ve had way better experiences with male doctors on average.
  10. karalianne reblogged this from madeofpatterns and added:
    I have a female doctor now but all of my former doctors have been male. My ADHD doctor is a man, and the OB/GYN I saw...