as small as a world and as large as alone, is it common for autistics to take rules they hear...

7:47am July 25, 2014

Anonymous asked: is it common for autistics to take rules they hear in passing more seriously? one time i read in a book to never do something twice (like an encore) bc it ruins it and i still follow that rule today and i dont really understand why.

clatterbane:

slashmarks:

dendriforming:

re-presentingautism:

askanautistic:

Yep, this is common. It’s due to rigidity of thinking, thinking in a way that’s not flexible or abstract. Rules are a very definite thing. People with flexible thinking however, would better be able to judge whether the rule was appropriate for all situations or important enough to be heeded at all. In contrast those with rigid thinking, like many Autistics, may see a rule as definite and feel compelled to adhere it in all situations or otherwise feel uncomfortable or anxious if they don’t.

I was nicknamed “The law enforcer,” “Dr. Heather,” and “Officer Heather” growing up. So, I’d think this might be something common amongst us autistic people!.

There are other possible reasons for this than rigid thinking. We can stand out in ways that make it easier for people to notice when we’re breaking rules. Often we’re held to different standards. Or we keep getting in trouble for breaking unstated rules, so we’re really careful to follow any explicitly stated rules we can find.

Being really unequipped to handle the potential consequences of breaking a rule can also contribute here. One of the big things for me as a kid was that, if I broke a rule, I’d have to use words to explain why. And I wasn’t able to reliably do that at all. So I was really careful to stick to any rules I could find.

I think part of it is also having trouble with arbitrary decision making. If you can’t decide between equally good options, which is a common executive functioning problem, finding rules that tell you which to take can be a big energy saver.

Definitely some good points. Especially about standing out, unwritten rules, and making decisions. A lot closer to my experiences than any kind of rigid thinking.

If you keep getting jumped on and you’re not always even sure why, you’re likely to look for some ways to try to avoid that. It may not even work that well a lot of the time (see: the unstated rules part), but you’re liable to be motivated to try anyway.

And/or eventually just say fuck it all, but that’s another story. :-|

I always thought it had something to do with something more OCD-like, when I did it.

Like if I heard “absence makes the heart grow fonder” and “out of sight, out of mind”, my brain would collapse and scream and freak out because it couldn’t follow both at once. And it tried to follow every single one. The level to which this happened seemed much more tied to my level of OCD-type thinking than to “autistic rigidity”. (I was never diagnosed with OCD, but I had all the classic signs beginning in childhood around maybe the age of six, peaking just before puberty, and fading with age after that until now I just have a few traits. Or it seems just a few compared to something that took over my life completely when I was younger.)

Notes: