Theme
8:31pm August 3, 2014

lichgem:

j0ye:

thelilysparks:

It’s amazing that people will see a kid yelled at or manhandled by a parent and say “It’s not my business, you can’t tell someone how to raise their kid” but if someone lets their son wear a dress it’s a public discussion.

THIS IS VERY RELEVANT

I remember something I read recently where a woman’s toddler liked to wear headbands, and an adult man in public was SO fucking bothered by it he came up and physically assaulted her son, and verbally assaulted her, and nobody did anything about it.

By physical assault I mean I think he yanked the headband off the kid’s head and gave him a “going to disguise my hostility as playfulness” cuff on the ear.

TW for public sexual assault of a developmentally disabled woman.

I once watched a man sexually assault a woman with Down’s syndrome in public.  She was sweeping the top of a table at my community college.  Some guys were obviously egging him on to do something, getting more and more excited.  He ran over, jumped up on the table, kissed her on the lips and then the breasts and then the crotch, as she stood stock still like she couldn’t believe what was happening.  I immediately reported the guy but nobody else did a damn thing, in fact I was the only person looking straight at her the entire time.  If I’d had the ability to initiate social conversations, I would’ve comforted her, but the most I could do was run to the disabled students’ office and tell them what had happened.  I’m still haunted by not having done enough, and by the way everyone besides me literally turned their heads away so they wouldn’t have to see what was happening.  The guy ran off laughing.  And I remember wondering whether I did the right thing to tell on the guy, because I was so unsure of my own ability to read social situations at that point that I felt like any reaction I had was probably wrong.  But the disability office told me I did exactly what I should have, that they knew the woman in question, and that they would be helping her.  And given that this community college had the best disability office in the entire state at that point (Anne was also going to the same college the same year, and used the same office I did), I believe that they did everything they could to help her and to get that guy in as much trouble as they possibly could.

I’ll never forget her face.  She just stood there, looking stunned, like she couldn’t believe, and yet she could believe, and was resigned, and traumatized, and violated, but numb and stunned and too stunned to do anything but stand there while his friends applauded loudly and laughed.

I wish I could go back in time and stop the whole thing.  I wish I was me-now because now I would never not directly intervene in a situation like that.  In fact I have intervened in situations like that, since.  But I was just out of institutions back then, and not out of the psych system, and I had only a tiny bit more nerve than the woman standing on the table.  :-(  I can also remember being her, sitting there doing absolutely nothing while a crowded room full of people (institution inmates and staff alike) watched someone stick his foot up my ass and wiggle it around for quite some time.  I didn’t move an inch, and was told later that nobody did anything because nobody thought I understood.  I wonder if that’s what the bystanders told themselves about the woman with Down syndrome.  I have never seen a human being look as defeated and miserable as she looked in that moment.  I will never forget it.

Notes:
  1. requintigre reblogged this from onelovelykat
  2. onelovelykat reblogged this from you-had-me-at-bacon
  3. captainxjack reblogged this from aubbae
  4. overr-joyed reblogged this from legalizereality
  5. httpstarlight reblogged this from kaworus-naglsa
  6. kaworus-naglsa reblogged this from tbhfunk
  7. sydchelle reblogged this from looney-bird
  8. looney-bird reblogged this from celluloidgirls
  9. kittykatlovesnobody reblogged this from celluloidgirls
  10. celluloidgirls reblogged this from cardaughter
  11. phoeburrito reblogged this from currentlylame
  12. currentlylame reblogged this from currentlylou
  13. dixie-wolf reblogged this from slimikinscaevity
  14. ednapontellier reblogged this from shakespeare-didnt-die-for-this
  15. loyal-ovaries reblogged this from retiredjesus
  16. blazing-bisexual reblogged this from legalizereality
  17. sherriiddaann reblogged this from thelilysparks
  18. the-only-emperor reblogged this from loveyoulots31394
  19. mothyvstheflame reblogged this from myuncertainlife
  20. californiacrisp reblogged this from floverna
  21. myuncertainlife reblogged this from pshalliwell
  22. ktheegreat reblogged this from llttlemermaid
  23. sjwbloghere reblogged this from boatloadofeminism
  24. pshalliwell reblogged this from babydraygen
  25. lets-find-ourselves-together reblogged this from skyvnderthesea
  26. skyvnderthesea reblogged this from brengmethehorizon
  27. yikes19 reblogged this from kurttheintrovert
  28. kurttheintrovert reblogged this from great-llamas
  29. wingedbrat reblogged this from olivemeister
  30. calypso-coexist reblogged this from hotboyproblems
  31. the-othersider reblogged this from kankenkiid
  32. aristotlesarchipelago reblogged this from still-413
  33. short-neurotic-brunette reblogged this from nosleepnocare
  34. tiarrific reblogged this from fall-out-boy
  35. diannesylvan reblogged this from redcognito
  36. marvel-heroine reblogged this from flowerr-bunny
  37. we-arethe-hunters reblogged this from kanaevonrosvvald
  38. kanaevonrosvvald reblogged this from karlmarxaesthetic
  39. karlmarxaesthetic reblogged this from thepizzaisaggressive
  40. still-413 reblogged this from flowerr-bunny