9:46pm August 17, 2014

So much for deciding to come back to tumblr today.

youneedacat:

It was the wrong day it was the wrong moment maybe I’ll never come back again I don’t know I just don’t know tonight is wrong everything is wrong why can’t people understand and things be simple? Why can’t people set things up, set up a working thing, look for how to make things work, before they go off at people? Why is the assumption always that the other person is doing something wrong that could be easily corrected, rather than that the situation is complex and requires a thoughtful and complex solution? Why is the assumption never that someone could really be getting hurt by these assumptions?

Because people are really really single-minded. People don’t see other points of view or even consider them. And that’s regardless of neurology, it’s not dependent on neurology it’s dependent on whether they’ve learned to consider other possibilities.

And it’s incredibly disappointing when they don’t let in the other possibilities when they’re explained to them, because it is hard work taking time to explain those possibilities and because I like to give others the benefit of the doubt.

I always hope people will read my explanations of things like that and come away with more knowledge.

The fact that it doesn’t happen all that often hasn’t destroyed my ability to hope that. I just keep trying.

Because sometimes that’s all you can do.

I’ve had a really long day.

And now I’ve somehow led people to think that I’m being attacked, so they’re getting defensive on my behalf, and I don’t want that, because I haven’t been attacked, and I don’t want to start a fight.

I don’t even know how to explain today.

It’s been a long awful day in a lot of ways.

I have a chest infection. It’s not helping.

I want the world to go away for a day.

Anyway I have not been attacked, nobody needs to defend me, least of all from someone who probably doesn’t even know who I am. Please don’t anyone start fights on my behalf. It’s fine to explain my position, but please don’t do it meanly, because nobody has been mean to me, just… people have been unthinking about some things, in a general way, and it’s hitting me harder than usual because I’m having a fucked up day.

Notes: